The Fat Kid Outside: Here’s our Dirty Version of Mr. Heussaff’s Healthy Dish

Words: Dwight Co/Photography: Mylene Chung/Styling and Recipe Development: Katherine Jao/August 2, 2012

140 32

Two days ago, we chopped off Erwan Heussaff’s head with a blade made out of bacon.

To those who are well versed in the art of sarcasm, you obviously know that this whole thing was a ruse. To those who went ballistic and took it a little bit too personally, then you must be one of three: (1) a true fan of Erwan Heussaff, (2) a true hater of Pepper.ph or (3) a bacon-deprived individual. We sincerely hope that you’re just either one or three.

Now, here’s what we really wanna do.

Since Pepper.ph and Erwan’s The Fat Kid Inside sit on opposite poles of the health chain (as his blog focuses on mostly healthy food), we wondered, “Wouldn’t it be cool if we could find a way to do something great with what we both do?” So, what we decided on was to create an enemy of The Fat Kid Inside here in Pepper.ph aptly called, The Fat Kid Outside.

Since we still don’t have an original logo for that guy, here’s someone who can temporarily fill the role.

In this segment, we’ll be transforming The Fat Kid Inside’s healthy dishes into downright dirty, greasy and guilt-inducing creations using similar ingredients. For today, we decided to morph Erwan’s Non-Fried Fried Chicken Pillows with Yellow Squash and Zucchini “Pasta” into a deadly beast—Butter-Fried Oatmeal-Breaded Chicken with Zucchini Cream & Pesto on Pumpkin Mash.

That was a mouthful.

Since Erwan was such a sport for letting us chop his head, we’ll leave him with a gift that he’ll hopefully consume as recommended.

Butter-Fried Oatmeal-Breaded Chicken with Zucchini Cream & Pesto on Pumpkin Mash

Yield: 2 servings

Ingredients for the Chicken

  • 2 cups chicken thigh fillet

Marinade in:

  • 1 tsp minced garlic
  • 1/2 tsp chicken powder
  • 2 tbsp honey
  • 3 tbsp cream
  • 1 tsp mustard
  • 1 tsp paprika
  • pinch of salt
  • pinch of pepper
  • 1-2 cups oatmeal, for dredging
  • 1/2 cup butter for frying

Ingredients for the Zucchini Cream Sauce

  • 1 1/2 cups zucchini cubes
  • 1/2 cup cream
  • 1/2 pc chicken cube

Ingredients for the Pumpkin Mash

  • 3 cups cubed pumpkin
  • enought water to cover
  • 1/4 cup butter
  • 1/4 cup cream
  • salt and pepper, to taste
  • pinch of nutmeg

Ingredients for the Pesto

  • 2 tbsp almonds
  • 1/2 cup basil
  • 3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
  • 1/2 tsp minced garlic
  • 1 tbsp balsamic vinegar
  • salt and pepper to taste

Procedure for the Chicken

  1. Marinate chicken for at least 30 minutes.
  2. Heat pan and melt butter.
  3. Dredge chicken pieces in oatmeal.
  4. Pan fry in batches, 3-4 minutes on each side.

Procedure for the Zucchini Cream Sauce

  1. Boil cream and zucchini together for 2 minutes.
  2. Season with chicken cube.
  3. Puree until well blended.
  4. Set aside.

Procedure for the Pumpkin Mash

  1. Boil pumpkin until tender. Drain water.
  2. Mash with butter, cream and seasonings while warm.
  3. Adjust seasonings.
  4. Set aside.

Procedure for the Pesto

  1. Pound all ingredients together using a mortar and pestle.
  2. Adjust seasonings to taste.

Assembly

  1. Put a heaping spoon of pumpkin mash on plate.
  2. Top with chicken pieces.
  3. Drizzle with zucchini cream.
  4. Top with pesto.
  5. Serve warm.

Dwight Co

Managing Director/Founder

When he was nine, Dwight stormed the kitchen and proudly cooked himself his first dish, Spam and eggs. Realizing his immense talent for cooking canned food, he co-founded Pepper.ph in 2012. Aside from directing Pepper.ph's content and design, Dwight also makes websites and runs a tiny ramen house in Burgos Circle called Wrong Ramen. See More.

  • Yoshinobi

    LOOOOOLLL!!!

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

       :D

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Den-Alibudbud/520953364 Den Alibudbud

    …what…is…chicken powder?

    also, that has to be the most evil thing i’d ever seen on pepper.ph. even more even than the giant bowl of Haagen-Dazs. o_o (is in awe)

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

      chicken powder is cheating powder.

      Haha, well we’re not sure what’s more evil, but this we’ll definitely have plenty more in the future. :D

  • http://www.facebook.com/Egay.Merene.Jr Kegs Merene

    OMNOMNOM!

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

       http://memegenerator.net/instance/22950184?urlName=Fat-Asian-Kid&browsingOrder=Popular&browsingTimeSpan=AllTime

  • http://fotologue.jp/thedean Dean

    LOL! Witty as always!

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

       Thanks Dean!

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/4WMVB3M3QCJGBDNPKZX5O3KTXA Camille

    Haha this really made me laugh out loud, especially your token of thanks. “Please eat it whole…” 

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

      Eating a whole slab of butter was the most disgusting thing we could think of at that moment hehe. Thanks for dropping by! :)

  • http://80breakfasts.blogspot.com/ Joey

    You guys are hilarious!  Ah, the gift of butter…is there anything better? ;)  Maybe a bacon lightsaber…

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

       maybe a butter bath? :P

      • http://80breakfasts.blogspot.com/ Joey

        maybe a bacon loofah? 

  • Nikita

    This site needs a “like” button on every single post

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

       Thank you Nikita! *Likes comment*

  • larafides

    enjoyed reading this! LOL! Nice one!

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

       Thanks lara! :)

  • K.L.

    are you guys and erwan really beefin right now? or is it just to make afriendly rivalry between your blogs?

    • http://twitter.com/dwightco Dwight Co

      haha we’re just fooling around! We’re actually pretty surprised some people think it’s a real fight. God, it’s a bacon sword! How can anyone take it seriously?! T_T

      • Jan

        Dwight, a bacon blade should always be taken seriously…especially when served on a plate…with garlic rice and/or fluffy scrambled eggs. :)

    • http://brklyn-christina.blogspot.com/ Christina

       Blogger beef! Blogger beef! Bring it!

      mmmm, beef….. 

  • http://twitter.com/giooraay Gio Ray Mangaya-ay

    I’d totally buy that bacon blade. :D 

  • http://www.lynne-enroute.com/ Ray for En Route

    If I can just “Unlike” this post so that I can “Like” it again… :D

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1018097558 Gin Chung

    WHAT is chicken powder and WHERE do you buy it???

  • SAB

    I am a true fan of Erwan Heussaff HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • fed

     the squashed mash looks “nakakaumay”.

    • fed

      i meant mashed squash. a memory relapse moment :))

  • Capresso

    it’s not a problem…i could rip myself to both site. when i feel like dieting>erwan. when i feel like indulging>pepper. all winners :)

  • http://quirkysuyen.com/ Suyen

    Pepper.ph’s pogi points just went up a bajillion times for me.

  • http://www.facebook.com/katdc Kat Dela Cruz

    Love this site! I actually appreciate what Mr. Heussaff is trying to do, what with encouraging people to eat good, healthy, fresh food. Alas, not everyone has the privilege of having those quality/expensive ingredients. I don’t think Lucky Me! Instant Pancit Canton will thrive as much if everyone had access to good-quality noodles or pasta dishes. That’s why I also appreciate that you try to bring food down to a level that more people can handle. I mean, I don’t think I can even get zucchini from the palenke. But I sure can get a pack of Fita anywhere.

  • Patrick Poculan

    Thanks goodness it was a ruse; since I both like you guys, Pepper.ph and FatKidInside. What I’ve got in the fridge is Dari Creme Classic Margarine. No butter in my small town. Is this OK?

  • http://twitter.com/mejeeps Jeeps

    fatty goodness